Mary Ellen Gray

With her warm, compassionate spirit, Mary Ellen Gray earned a place in the hearts of many. As a teacher, daughter, and wife, she was always a voice of support and love. Through her own example, Mary Ellen taught her most important lesson of all, one of love, faith, and courage.

With the end of World War II, thousands of young soldiers returned home to their civilian lives and families. The economy boomed to meet the demands of the post-war economy. Corporate expansion provided more jobs, and more and more women integrated themselves into the working world. Amid this industrial growth, the baby boom was also underway. Rodney Quentin and his wife Rosemary were among the many expecting parents, and on June 10, 1953, they were blessed with the healthy birth of their daughter Mary Ellen.

Rodney was originally from New Orleans and came to Michigan to go to school, earning a master's degree in chemistry. While in Detroit, he met and fell in love with Rosemary. She was the reason he stayed up North, and soon enough they were married and living happily in Detroit, in the Lincoln Park area. Mary Ellen was their eldest of four children, the Alpha Child; she was later joined by Edmond, Larry, and Rosemarie.

Even in the early years of her childhood, Mary Ellen proved to be very liberal and open-minded, a compassionate young girl who cared for the downtrodden. She was strong willed and well-organized for a child. In her free time she enjoyed reading, a hobby that would follow her into her adult life. She won several reading awards throughout her childhood; her family remembers the tall stack of books she devoured over summer vacation one year. Mary Ellen enjoyed her quiet life at home, and she even liked to help out with the gardening and household chores.

The Quentins lived in a small house. Mary Ellen and her younger sister Rosemarie were always very close. If one started speaking, the other could usually finish her sentence; they spent enough time together that they could read each other's thoughts. Moreover, they were great friends; both of them always knew that they could go to the other whenever needed, no matter what. Mary Ellen was also very close to Ilene Hogan, with whom she made a strong bond with that lasted through her adult years.

After grade school, Mary Ellen enrolled at Mercy High School, from where she graduated in 1971. She spent a lot of her free time traveling to and from school. This never bothered Mary Ellen: she was very much a homebody, and she enjoyed her independence. Throughout high school, Mary Ellen worked part-time at a nearby pharmacy, a job she would keep during her enrollment at Mercy College as well. But after just a short time at Mercy College, she transferred to the University of Michigan - Dearborn.

At this time, Mary Ellen's mother was working at BASF. During a sales training program, she met a handsome young man named Stephen Gray, who was originally from Hollywood, California. Always a helpful mother, Rosemary asked if he was involved with anyone. "No," he answered, and Rosemary opened her purse to show him pictures of her eldest daughter.

When Rosemary informed her daughter of her matchmaking activities, Mary Ellen replied with an evil eye; she treasured her independence, and she disliked the idea of being "set up." But when Stephen Gray called the house, he and Mary Ellen easily fell into a conversation that lasted two hours. This was the beginning of their lives together. They shared an interest in fine cuisine and enjoyed going out to dinners. Conversation bloomed effortlessly between them, and they also enjoyed the company of a mutual social group. Although Mary Ellen did not care for sports, Stephen convinced her to join him for the first Red Wings game at Joe Louis Arena. They sat right up next to the glass, and by the end of the evening, Mary Ellen admitted that she had had a very memorable time. They also enjoyed going to the movies and art museums. On May 26, 1979, the happy couple was married.

Just after they were married, Stephen's job required him to relocate to California. Mary Ellen followed him, though this decision prevented her from finishing her degree at University of Michigan - Dearborn. But California treated Stephen and Mary Ellen kindly. They settled in the Belmont Shore Apartments, just two blocks from the ocean; the sea breathed through their apartment, which was nicely decorated by Mary Ellen. She enjoyed taking walks up and down the beach, and also liked observing the California social scene and lifestyle. She met all of Stephen's friends and enjoyed their company. Mary Ellen also found a job working in a hospital lab on Long Beach. This was one of the happiest times in her life.

Diversey Wyandotte transferred Stephen back to Michigan, where he and Mary Ellen happily resumed their life in the Midwest. Back in Detroit, Mary Ellen completed her bachelor's degree in education at University of Michigan - Dearborn in 1982. Over the next several years, Stephen's job required him and Mary Ellen to move a total of six times between Michigan and California, then a stay in Oakville, Ontario, just outside of Toronto. From 1991 to 1994, he worked at the company's world headquarters there. He and Mary Ellen then returned to Michigan, and they settled just outside Detroit in West Bloomfield.

Though it was difficult to move around the country so frequently, Mary Ellen was always understanding of the requirements Stephen's job placed before him. Wherever they moved, Mary Ellen was able to find work as a teacher. In Canada, she was unable to work due to her visa status. However, her reputation as an excellent teacher spread through her community, and soon she was tutoring neighborhood kids, family friends, and children with learning disabilities. Mary Ellen was so high valued as a teacher that her school in Dearborn granted her a three year leave of absence and held her position.

At home, Mary Ellen enjoyed spending time in her garden and around the house. She was known for her green thumb, and her home decorations always earned the approval of friends and family. At home she enjoyed the company of her two cats, Snodgrass and Sylvester. As a teacher, Mary Ellen was very devoted to her students, and her example inspired many to pursue careers in education. She held a deep belief for her faith, and she was exceedingly kind to all.

During her illness, Mary Ellen always carried herself with dignity and courage. Throughout her battle with cancer, Mary Ellen was an icon of strength and bravery to her friends, students, and family. She was diagnosed three years ago, on New Year's Day.

Mary Ellen will be remembered as a woman who loved life, her family, close friends, her many students, and her Lord.

Mary Ellen died on June 2, 2005. Beloved wife of Stephen. Loving daughter of Rosemary and the late Rodney Quentin. Sister of Edmond (Mary) Quentin, Larry Quentin and Rosemarie (Bart) Quinley. Also survived by many nieces and nephews. Visitation Sunday at McCabe Funeral Home, 31950 W. 12 Mile Rd., Farmington Hills, MI, from 4-9 pm with a rosary service at 7 pm. Funeral Monday at Prince of Peace Catholic Church, West Bloomfield, MI, in-state at 10 am with Mass at 10:30 am. Memorials to Capuchin Soup Kitchen or American Cancer Society. Please visit Mary Ellen's personal web page at www.lifestorynet.com, where you can archive a favorite memory, sign the guestbook, or make a memorial contribution.